If there is one thing that sucks worse than being sorted into the last category in your class grades list, that is not being sorted anywhere at all.

So today during chinese lecture our class is divided into 3 groups: The As, the Bs and the Cs and below. For some freaking reason I haven't been performing well in chinese this term (its fucking embarassing okay.) and I winded up in the last category. So I was walking in depression to the lecture hall and when I reached there, they said I am NOT in the list, and neither am I in the B category as well! But I as so positive my form teacher put my name in the Cs and when she saw me she told me I am in B. I was trying to explain to her that the teacher in B said my name isn't on the B list. Guess what, my form teacher impatiently dismissed me because she is BROWSING ON WEIBO (fyi its like twitter for China). She sound really annoyed and dissed at me because I am interrupting her scrolling and putting up a very bitchy frowny face, all while her eyes are trained on twitter.

AND SO I HAVE NOWHERE TO GO FOR THAT SESSION.
But luckily the teacher who is in-charge of taking the As kindly took me in. I love her omg, her voice is not as high and she let me get the point.

Okay I've been tolerating my form for a really long time but this is the last straw. As a teacher she shouldn't place Weibo>students (I mean, times there are when I use my iPad in class but it is when either she isn't talking directly to me and often nothing of importance at all). She once mentioned my name to another class when I failed my failed my situation writing, citing me as a negative example. I mean, I don't mind if she used my marks but holy is it really necessary to point out my name?! That is degrading alright, I have no idea how to face that class anymore (it is next door somemore ugh) and I have to collab with some of them because of some scholarship thing. And as if I am not annoyed enough, she have to constantly use me as example for bad writing in my own class. (It isn't just me, she used so many other students who are weaker in chinese and make the situation so awkward that I wish she could just shut up for the sake of my classmates)

Screw this shit my Chinese isn't bad at all even, I just keep writing out of point and hence losing all the marks. But that does NOT mean she can just humiliate me, credits to her I really hate the subject now (the language is nice tho). And I'm not even being sour. Getting low grades is one thing, I don't really mind that because I will try to figure out where my problem lies. I won't hate a subject because my grades are poor... But getting low grades and humiliated at the same time is another, it is so demoralising and now I'm not motivated to do anything remotely Chinese-ish at all.

Maybe she doesn't know its humiliating. But she should.

Labels: chinese, school